A Year in Review and Our New Years Resolution

    "Tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one." Brad Paisley

      Is 2013 really over? Time has just flown by! This past year has been one of the best years of my life- God has rained His blessings upon us. So many beautiful, nerve-wrecking, glorious events have happened, and I can't help but to stand in awe of who God is. I have fallen so much deeper in love with Him. How about I take you on a tour of this past year?

      Starting with the end of 2012. On December 15th, 2012, I married the love of my life. Russell isn't your run-of-the-mill guy. Russell is the type of man who leaves love notes on the bed as he's hurrying off to work, so I can read his thoughts when I wake up. He surprises me delicious, home made creations that he was secretly working on in the kitchen. Russell will wash the dishes after a long day of work, because he can see that I'm feeling overwhelmed. He's always the first one to say "I'm sorry" and he never leaves the house without a hundred "I love you's" and kisses. If I could have designed my dream man, he would have still been lost in Russell's shadow. Our wedding day was beautiful. My parents worked hard to make my wedding a dream come true, my mom at one point working 3 jobs and my step dad trucking for well over 60 hours. I didn't ask them to pay for my wedding, they just assumed that position, and denied my husband and I practically nothing. From the flowers (poinsettias and roses) to the entertainment (violinist and harpist, cigar tastings, wine tastings, art gallery, etc.) my parents made our wedding a night to remember. I'm not saying this to gloat about how perfect my wedding was, I didn't have any hand in the expenses so there's nothing for me to gloat about, I'm saying this because I can't stress enough how blessed I am by my family. My mother went through a terrible divorce years ago, but she never let that be a reason for Dougie (my brother) and I to go without. My mother is my hero. So anyway, back to my wedding story (one last I love you shout out to mommy and Dave!). We married at the historic Glen Foerd Mansion in Philadelphia on a chilly December evening. I wore a lacy, mermaid style dress with a sweetheart neck line and my family's jewelry (there's something intimate and beautiful about wearing your grandparents jewelry on your wedding day). Here's some pictures of the wedding details:

The beautiful Glen Foerd Mansion on our wedding day. Notice the garland and ribbons hanging across the porch and deck railings

The wedding bouquet my darling mother inlaw made for me. The calla lilies are Russell's favorite flowers, while roses are mine. The berries and pine celebrate the season. Isn't she creative?

Russell getting ready for the wedding. Something I love about Russ is he injects his personality into everything wears, as you can see by the socks

My beautiful wedding dress and veil

      The wedding was lovely. The aisle was framed with candles and rose peddles, the walls were glass, so we had a dazzling view of the river and pine trees outside. Our wedding party walked to the song "I Can't Help Falling Inlove with You" by Elvis. Dave crafted us a gorgeous metal canopy to say our vows under (complete with our initials). We said traditional vows and wrote our own vows. We also had a candle lighting ceremony. We kissed and raced down the aisle to the song "A Whole New World" from the Aladdin movie.

The gorgeous room where the wedding ceremony took place

A detail shot of the poinsettias and candles

Russell and I getting married!

 

       The ceremony led into the cocktail hour, which was both a time of excitement for Russ and I (we're finally married! yay!) and a time to get our nerves under check (I didn't pass out at the alter! yay!). I've gone to enough weddings to know that cocktail hour can be a drag, especially if you're one of the wedding guests who doesn't know any one else. Russ and I didn't want that for our guests, we wanted our cocktail hour to be exciting and fun! So our guests had their choice of things to do: browse through Glen Foerd's art gallery (including works from Monet), enjoy a wine tasting in the wine cellar, smoke a few cigars, listen the harpist and violinist, or just go explore the mansion. This was also the time when we took all the family photos. 

Russ and I at the entrance of the art gallery

My handsome brother, Douglas, and my beautiful grandmother, Granna

Our signature drink was the Candy Cane Martini and the photo on the right was barrel that was directing our guests to the wine cellar. 

The elegant woman in the light pink is my mother. She's surrounded by her friends in the wine cellar.

The wedding party! Starting from the left, Maura (maid-of-honor), Dougie (groomsman, brother), me, Russell, Taylor (bridesmaid, sister), Zach (groomsman, Russell's brother)

      Russ and I did something a little non-traditional and special, we had our first dance after cocktail hour and before dinner. We chose to have our dance in the spacious sitting room of the mansion. Our song was Christina Perry's "Thousand Years," and as we danced the DJ covered the floor with glowing snowflake lights. The guests made a big circle around us as we danced.

Russell's parents

My parents

 

 

     After sharing a dance I will always treasure, we sat down to a delicious meal. The guests had their choice of either pecan crusted chicken stuffed with cheese, pork topped with apples, or pumpkin gnocchi. I got the chicken, Russ got the pork. Doug and Maura gave beautiful toasts. What's neat about dining in the mansion is that different tables were spread to different rooms, it was literally like you were invited to a huge, old fashion dinner party during the turn of the century. 

The favors and table numbers. Everyone received a beautiful, hand crafted glass ornament to put on their Christmas trees. We got them from Wheaton Glass in Millville

Maura and Dougie giving their toasts. Maura was my roommate at Widener University and best friend. Dougie and I have been bffs since he popped out the womb in 1990. 

Russ and I loving the toasts

    Finally, it was time to paaaarty! Everyone filed into the glass room where the ceremony took place, which was now glittering from Christmas trees and pulsing with music. We had all the traditional dances (including the removal of the garter, which my husband did to a routine he made for "I'm Sexy and I know It" by LMFAO) and the cutting of the cake. It was an incredible night! I hope I can give my children the type of wedding my family gave to Russ and I.

Russ dancing with his mama

 

 

The removal of the garter dance, as you can see my husband's got moves! The photo on the right is the tossing of the bouquet. 

My parents dancing

      That was December 15th in a nutshell! It was filled with laughing, crying and an incredible concentration of love. The very next day we raced off to the airport to go on our honeymoon to Puerto Rico!  Russell and I had been on a few vacations together before our trip to Puerto Rico, but this was Russell's first trip out of America and both of our first experiences in the Caribbean. Our honeymoon was a breath taking array of mouth watering food, toe tapping music and an exotic ecosystem. We would love to return to Puerto Rico soon. Here's a few pictures from our beautiful honeymoon:

(above) Climbing El Morro, a colonial, Spanish fort. (below) the view from the fort and Russ with an Iguana that lived in the neighboring fort, San Cristobal.

Enjoying lunch at Raices

 The 3 pictures you see are from our food tour of Old San Juan. The bartender (above) is world renown, and showed us how to make real Mojitos. The picture on the lower left is our mojito and food samples (fish fritter, ceviche, and a sweet potato fitter) and the picture on the right is Russ having fun with one of the many masks

The three photos you see below are our exploration of the El Yunque rainforest. The waterfall was so refreshing!

The next 3 photos you see are of our snorkeling trip (a first for both of us!). Notice how blue the water is!

 

One of Russell and I's favorite things to do in Puerto Rico was explore San Juan. There is so much to do and see! The following pictures are of our travels through the streets of San Juan.

      We snorkeled, kayaked through the bio luminescent bay, explored the rainforest, ate local food and explored Old San Juan all in less then a week. It was tremendous and exhilarating. I would love to go back!

      This may seem like a lot, but everything that I've written about so far only happened in one month in 2012. Let's get a move on and start celebrating 2013.

      2013 was an emotional and spiritual year for me. Russ and re-dedicated our lives to Christ mid 2012, so 2013 we were experiencing blessings that I had only read about before. I'll start at the beginning. From January till May Russ and I had our noses to our school books, blazing through essays and exams to reach our long awaited BA in psychology. We both graduated with high grades and hopes for big future.

 We also went to our first of many concerts for 2013, a Kutless show, that also featured the band Luminate, at the Levoy in Millville. The picture below is of the audience from Luminate's perspective. We had so much fun and it sparked a fire in us for Christian concerts. We would go on to see Relient K and Willet shows.

       Our summer started with a bang, and became one sequential vacation after another. Our first stop was in the NY mountains to visit Maura on her birthday. We spent that weekend admiring a park in the mountains, swimming and trampolining at our friend Rich's house, playing volleyball with Maura's family and releasing fire lanterns into the sky. It was a lovely weekend.

Russ and Maura on the beach

I'm fierce when I play!

The fire had special chemicals in it to make it burn different colors

     On the way home from Maura's Russ and I decided to stop at one of our favorite places in the world, Gettysburg. I have been visiting Gettysburg since I was a child - seeing Gettysburg is almost like eating comfort food to me, it feels homey. I can't wait to bring my little bundle to Gettysburg one day! So many memories!

This is actually one of my favorite sites in Gettysburg, it's the first this I see when driving in!

       The highlight of our summer came in late June: CREATIONFEST!! Russell and I are music people, Russ is actually quite talented in the area of music, while I'm excellent at listening ;p Either way, music is an important part of our lives, and a passion we share. Now, combine a love for music with praise and celebration to the Lord, you've got Creationfest! It's an incredible experience! Everyday, from when you wake until you, thoroughly exhausted, crawl back into your tent, there is worship going on. Whether you like pop, rap, hardcore, metal, country or dance, you can throw your arms up to God in whatever genre gets your feet moving. Some of the bands we saw were Skillet, Newsboys, Switchfoot, David Crowder, Lecrea, and the list goes on and on. Besides the concerts, there is also an art gallery (where I spent much of my time in), lectures, comedy, tons of shopping, and a variety of foods to try. You can even do things like skateboarding and rock climbing if that interests you. Every night there is a huge, headliner concert followed by some powerful worship. I can't say enough wonderful things about Creationfest, you just have to come and see for yourself! Here's some photos of the many concerts:

The incredible drummer from Newsboys

Yes, he and his drum set is spinning

Lecrae! One of Russell's favorite musicians

Switchfoot!

Besides the tremendous music scene there were also baptisms! In fact, a man who I love so very much was baptized this past summer at Creationfest!

  
      Lastly, the nights at Creationfest were filled with worship and beauty. From communion, to a candle ceremony, to fire works, the nights were filled with celebration to the Lord.

      Ahhh, just reminiscing about Creationfest brings warm and fuzzy feelings. Anyway, continuing on! After our exciting trips in June we prepared for a whole new adventure with our friends Serena and Dave - the Pennsic War. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, the Pennsic War lasts 2 weeks during the summer, late July- early August. During that time you celebrate all things medieval. You set up camp, dress up in medieval garb, and spend the next two weeks living out life as if you were born in 1202. Russ and I only stayed for one week, but we had a great time! During the day you do things such as: whiskey tastings, shopping in one of the hundreds of merchant tents, attending a history or cooking class, learning to dance medieval dances, or watching the war take place (armies "battling"). You can spend your evening at a ball, or perhaps at one of the many camp parties, or star gazing in a big, quiet field. It's nuzzled in the beautiful PA mountains, and you really get a sense of how your ancestors may have spent an day or evening. We made some wonderful friends and learned some new crafts (Russell now sews leather). Oh yea! That reminds me, I made many of the outfits you see Russ and I wearing! Thanks to Serena and her mom, I now can use a sewing machine =)

Here are some examples of the clothes worn at pennsic:

Wearing a belly shirt was the easiest to construct, and it really helped stay cool in the blazing heat

Serena - queen of Pennsic fashion - and our guide, lucky us!

 We did all sorts of things during our week at Pennsic, here's some photos of activities we did throughout the day:

The boys working on leather

Me, Russ, Serena, Dave, and our whiskey-tasting instructor (it was a tough class =p )

I'm in the green skirt, learning how to belly dance!

Russell having an Italian dancing lesson

Russ in a drumming circle

      Like I said before, there were lots of shopping opportunities! Here's some photos of us browsing through the merchants tents.

Any Halo fans reading? =)

Dancing in the streets

Russ buying me flowers =)

      Part of the fun of Pennsic is exploring. The next batch of photos is our little group going out and exploring what Pennsic had to offer:

A belly dancer performing

 Star gazing! (I never had seen more shooting stars then that night at Pennsic)

Dave, Serena, Russ and I having fun at a camp party!

 Lastly, you could have fun in your own backyard in Pennsic. There was lots of things to do around the camp:

Getting henna on my foot

A fire dancer!

      Oh, and I can't forget one last, very special picture:

THAT'S RIGHT! A tardis was in Pennsic! Who could blame the Dr for getting a little confused on the time period?

      If you think that summed up our Pennsic vacation, think again. Russ and I made a pit stop in Pittsburgh on the way home (we had never been to Pittsburgh before). It was a really cool experience! It reminded me of a cleaner version of Philadelphia in the mountains. The whole city seemed to be sit in a mountain-lined bowl. We want to bring my parents up sometime in the future to explore.

Pittsburgh, here we come!

Lunch at the famous Primanti Brothers!

Russell, charging ahead!

Yum!

      We wandered for hours through Pittsburgh, browsing through spice shops and touring fish markets. We only had time to explore one corner of the huge city, so we can't wait to go back some time and see more!

      Before we finally arrived home, we made one more stop for dinner: a charming, 1800's restaurant called Farmer's Hope in PA. The restaurant was covered in lush gardens and bushes filled with butterflies. After reading about my wedding, and my trips to Gettysburg and Pennsic, I'm sure you can see that re-living history is an important part of my life. I guess it can be understood through the lens of 2 of my great passions: writing/reading and art. History is one long story with tons to see. Farmers Hope was so elegant and charming (and don't forget a little spooky - definitely felt a presence).

 

 

Russell pretending to rock out on an antique piano

       Still with me? Good! We just got through July. I have one more exciting vacation, and it's found in August. If it wasn't for little things like money and security, Russell and I would be nomads, traveling the world with our baby. Tasting our way through Rome, riding camels through Egypt, learning Akido in Japan! Ok, ok, I'll get back to 2013. Onwards!

      If you're from the tri-state area, there's one vacation that's always a tradition: the beach. Ever since I can remember my family has spent one week, during the summer, at the shore. Those weeks have been filled with sand, ocean, surf boards and theme parks. The mornings smell alive with Granna's popping bacon and sizzling potatoes, the living room is littered with my many baby cousins toys, and Russ and I's bedroom is always stuffed with my summer reading list. It was at the beach that I learned to fly a kite (Poppop Selfridge found great joy in inciting wonderment in his grandchildren and great grandchildren's eyes). It was also in Sea Isle that I'd dig through rocks and crevices to find crabs, star fish and sunset stained sea shells. It's a fun time to bond with family over home cooked meals, thundering fire works and the reluctant sharing of the tv remote. This past year we rented a nuns' retreat house in Sea Isle City, it's roomy and quiet. Here's are some pictures of my huge family at our beach house:

From left to right: Granny (great grandmother), Aunt Jackie, Christian (family friend), Dougie, Dave, Me, Russell, Alyssa, Uncle Greg, Johnny, Jessie, Granna, Aunt Robin, Aunt Cindy, Ben, FRONT: Kevin and Ben Jr *and think, there's some people missing from this picture!*

Poppop, Mason and Ben Jr enjoying the sand

Russell killing it at the arcade!

      Now, with all the vacations Russ and I were taking this summer you may be thinking, what else could they have possibly had time for? Well, here's your answer: we both had jobs and we were preparing for a big move! Russ and I had been living with my parents in a damp, cramped basement,  for some time, so we were ready to start looking for a new home by the end of the summer, but God had other plans. As we began searching for apartments in the area, my parents announced that they were putting their house up for sale, and they wanted us to move with them.

      Now, the idea of sharing a house with your parents may sound like a strange idea for some people, but to those people I would say - I think that taking on new debt (when you're already swamped with college loans) to be in a small home that you'll probably move out of in a few years is a stranger idea. If Russ and I worked full time at the jobs we were at and moved into a small apartment the rent and utility bills, plus our student loans, credit card debt, cost of living bills and everyday expenses would have meant depending on welfare to scrape by each month. Why would we chose that? So, we halted our plans and chose to follow our parents, we both knew that the decision we made was one coming from wisdom. It wouldn't take long before my parents stumbled across our family's dream home: a large house that had been split into a half a double. My parents could live on one side and Russ and I would live on the other. We would pay rent to my parents and begin to start chipping away at our debt. Everything about the house felt right, and I knew that this was the place God wanted us to be, but it would take a series of miraculous events to finally bring our family to the front steps of our house. One of the first trials was my mom's credit. My mom had struggled year after year to pay for everything she owned upfront, because her credit had been destroyed during her divorce. As she stood before the daunting prospect of trying to convince a bank to give her loan a bright light shone into the darkness: there had been a mistake! My mother's mangled credit score wasn't from her doing, it was a mistake that the bank had made years ago, and had never changed. So began a long process of fixing her credit score. To her aid came many dedicated accountants and advisers, who took on her case with the same veracity that they would have applied to their own loans. Next came the mountains of expenses for moving, from failing inspections that needed to be fixed to payments to help her healing credit score. Despite many anxious nights my parents were able to pay every single expense. My great aunt, Aunt Linda, played a huge role in the securing of our home. She was our real estate agent, and she had a sharp eye for the business. She talked to my mother everyday, offering advice and encouragement, inspecting our house with a fine tooth comb and negotiating with the buyers. We sold our old house at the end of September and moved into our new family home. Because my mom's credit was still climbing, the owner allowed us to rent, but if my mom couldn't produce a loan by December the house would go back on the market. We prayed and prayed to the Lord, and I had a peaceful sense that this house was ours. There was no need to fear or worry, God would provide. On October 31st, two months a head of schedule, Aunt Linda finalized the deal on my family's dream home, we officially owned our home! Sadly, the very next day Aunt Linda passed away, my mother was one of the last people she spoke to. I am so happy that I got to know my Aunt Linda better this past year. Her dedication is one of the reasons I'm recounting this story in my living room. So now you know about our miracle home! Buying this home resulted in the healing of my mother's credit, a relationship with my Aunt Linda, Russ and I could chip away at our debt, we had a home to build a family in, and it gave us the flexibility for me to be a stay at home mom. We felt God's hand in every nook and cranny of this process.

      Russ and I continued to celebrate our passion for music and God at the Uprise music festival this past September. Happily, my parents joined us! It was a lovely concert series...on the first night lol. Let me explain: After we set up our tent and explored the festival we were excited to see everything offered. Rides and activities were set up for children. Music, ministries and contests were presented on every corner of the festival. We watched Skillet, Tenth Avenue North, We As Human, We Are Leo and Capital Kings perform. The first day was a lot of fun! The second day started out well, my parents arrived and we all watched some concerts and played some contests. By the time the afternoon hit the heavens opened and the rain came down...hard. We tried to go back to our tent and wait it out, but it progressed into something angry. Our tent started to leak and our floor became soaked ( on top of that, we forgot a tarp to put under our tent, so stepping onto the tent floor sunk your foot into ankle deep water). We tried to listen to Duck Dynasty speakers Jep and Jessica, but once the rain combined with the wind we had to say uncle and pack up our water soaked tent. Thankfully, my parents generously shared their hotel room in Gettysburg with us. We spent the next day enjoying Gettysburg and having a tasty lunch.

Russell taking a rest after we set up camp

The concerts were so much fun:

Mom and Dave enjoying the music

Capital Kings shared the stage with a quick performance from Micheal Tait from the Newsboys

Skillet!

Mainstage

But alas, we had to retreat:

Can you see how wet my hair was? Lol, the hot shower at the hotel was heaven

      Many times, between September to November, I started seeing a neurologist at Virtua to try and understand my seizures. Did I have epilepsy? Is it safe to get pregnant? Do I need to be on medicine? I began a series of tests, from a day long cognition test, to a 72 hour EEG, to interview after interview. I had done most of the testing before years ago to try and understand my condition, but I wanted a second opinion. Here's a photo of my beginning with the EEG:

      Once the testings were completed and the results were finally in, my Granna drove me up to Virtua to hear the results. It was a tense session, I was prepared for the worst (a lifetime on medication and the threat of future brain damage due to epileptic seizures). To my surprise, that's not what the doctor said. He said he was 70% sure that I had non-epileptic seizures that were produced from stress. I did not need to be on medicine or worry about healthy complications due to epilepsy, and he also gave me full sails a head to get pregnant. I cried with happiness in the doctor's office and couldn't wait to announce the news to my family. This event reminds me to touch on another important life decision: I'm going to be a stay at home mom and wife for a little while. Staying at home has enabled me to take care of my home, prepare healthy, time consuming meals, focus on my art, and most importantly: manage my stress. Stress has a direct tie to my seizures, and remaining at home has given my body an opportunity to relax a little. It's a tremendous blessing. Now that I'm pregnant I can devote my full attention to my little bundle when he or she is born. Praise God!

     November flew by. We celebrated our new home by staying in on Thanksgiving and hosting a small, intimate Thanksgiving with Russ and I's parents and siblings. It was beautiful. Russell and Dave made the Thanksgiving table centerpiece, I made a Thankful tree (to hang all the things we were thankful for on as leaves), and we all worked on the tasty food. It was a beautiful night, filled with laughter, exchanging of stories, and mouth watering food.

Thanksgiving table

      Whew! We've traveled through the highlights of 2013 from January to November. Now lets finish up with the exciting and joyous month of December! So much has happened in 31 days! Let's begin with December 14th, the night before Russell and I's one year wedding anniversary. Russell had a holiday work party the 14th that we decided to go to, so my mom gave me an early Christmas gift - she paid for my hair to get done up, that way I'd feel confident meeting all Russell's coworkers. It was a great night! There was a photo booth, dancing, raffles and tons of wonderful people to meet. Russ and I had a great time. The next day Russ surprised me with a trip to Glen Foerd Mansion on our one year anniversary. We listened to live music while browsing through art we hadn't even seen on our wedding day. It was a great day.

      A week or so later, we found out I was pregnant! Yay! What a Christmas gift! After exchanging gifts with family and friends ( I received a sewing machine and a trip to Sight and Sount theater!) we announced our pregnancy and spent the rest of Christmas basking in the glow of a bright, baby filled future.

      So, now I'm left with this question: What's my New Year resolution? What promise to myself do I want to see fufilled in 2014? While I think about that, I want to share Russell's New Year resolution:

"2014 is the year to better myself. Everything I do is going to be even more significant this year. Last year I was a newlywed, which came with loving responsibilities, challenges, and perks ;-)! This year is going to kick things up a notch- I’m no longer going to be solely a husband, best friend, and lover to my wife. In 2014 I need to start my transition into 'WORLDS BEST DAD' (of course to the best of my ability). My goal for myself is to be the absolute best man I can be for my family. For Ashley (the future Mommy): I want to be more patient, caring, and nurturing to her needs as a first time pregnant mother. For Ashley (my Wifey): I want to be even more loving, romantic, and thoughtful. For my future son or daughter: I want be reliable, strong, consistent, fun, and, of course, a cool dad. My number one priority this year of 2014 is to draw my family nearer to God; I want our family to fully embrace the ideals of LOVE, HOPE, & FAITH! I want to be able to say for the rest of our lives,
 “…as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” (Joshua 24:15)"

 Well, it's going to be hard to follow up that lol. But, here's my resolution:

      My New Year's resolution is a two-part deal. Part one: I want to be more socially brave. Despite my adoration for writing, talking with me can be like interacting with a church mouse lol. I'm very quiet and normally buzzing with anxiety. To help cope with my nerves I've become quite a hermit, for better and worse. I, like most introverts, find peace and satisfaction with my privacy. I don't want to change my me-time, I just want to adjust the frequency. I'd like to start following through with social obligations, start initiating texts and catching up with old friends. My goal is to widen my circle a little, work on some neglected friendships and build memories. My second deal: I want to lay a strong, faith-based foundation for this child. I want this baby to be born into a home that not only reads scripture, but follows it as well. That means more patience, less complaining, and lots of I love yous. I want my child's life to be a dedication to the Lord, and that starts by making my life a dedication. I hope everyone reading will help me do that =) Helping me can be little things, like remembering my family in your prayers, or sharing a verse with me that may encourage my spirit. If God has done something wonderful in your life, let me know! I'd love to celebrate with you!

      So, with those final words, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!