To OBGYN or not to OBGYN

  "Rigid plans work best if you're building a skyscraper; with something as mysteriously human as giving birth, it's best, both literally and figuratively, to keep your knees bent."  ~Mark Sloan   

      Ahhh...the question every pregnant woman has to ask herself...who will be my delivery room knight in shining armor? Will my knight carry the sacred epidural needle *angels sing* that Hollywood portrays as the "light at the end of the tunnel" for every laboring mother? Will my knight serenade me with sweet songs about natural birthing? Will my knight...oh, let's just skip to the chase, do I want to go OBGYN or midwife?

      I'm kinda stuck on this question. If I could describe to you my dream delivery, it would go like this: I, after awaking from pleasant dreams on my soft. warm bed would realize that I was having contractions (easy contractions...like on a pain scale from 0-10 it'd be rated kittens and cake), after rousing my doting husband I would put on a beautiful dress and do my makeup (need to have scrapbook worthy photos!) before rushing off to Elmer hospital where my midwife would help me deliver in a spacious tub, with soft music playing in the background...oh oh and candles! Now, as realistic as this all may sound, I was jolted back to reality when I had a phone call with a midwife who delivers at Elmer. Due to my seizure disorder I could not deliver a baby in a tub, despite the fact that water soothes me and would be a comforting environment for a newborn, if I went unconscious it would be very dangerous for everyone involved. Which brings me to the second blow, I could not deliver at Elmer, which was a small, country hospital with a beautiful maternity ward. Elmer didn't offer emergency care, and since a seizure could be dangerous the midwife wasn't comfortable with the idea. She suggested other hospitals before hanging up.

      Well, there went my plans. But, the Bible does warn about this in Proverbs 16:9, "The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps." I can daydream all I want about how things will go for delivery, but it's God who knows my body and will direct my path towards the decision that's best for this baby. So, the door is shut on Elmer, but not necessarily on working with a midwife. Which brings me to the question at hand, which is a better choice, the midwife or the OBGYN?

      I guess I should explain why I was originally favoring a midwife. The midwife's philosophy is that a woman's body was designed for giving birth, so she is already equipped with everything needed for a healthy, drug free labor. The midwife doesn't just attend to the physical needs of a patient, but she becomes a friend and adviser. You can call your midwife and talk about your worries or questions throughout your pregnancy. The midwife even works with you postpartum, making sure that both baby and mommy are healthy physically and emotionally. I really like that idea; and I agree that a woman's body is designed to be able to handle a normal birthing experience. Here's where I now get stuck: what if I don't have a normal birthing experience? What if I need a cesarean? What if I do have a seizure? Should I trust the natural path if my body can be a little abnormal? What if I get really sick, can a midwife give me anti-nausea medication or is it a strictly no-drug environment? I have a friend who wanted to have a natural labor but ended up really sick and needing an epidural, what if I have the same experience? As you can see, I'm spinning in circles.


      Which leads me to my next candidate, the OBGYN. The OBGYN is a doctor who specializes in reproduction and pregnancy. According to What To Expect When You're Expecting over 90% of women chose an OBGYN as their medical adviser during pregnancy. Unlike a midwife, the OBGYN is a doctor and can prescribe medication as he/she sees fit. They can handle emergency situations like a caesarean, or in my case, a seizure. That's one of the most important attributes I need in my physician- that they can handle whatever my body throws at them. There are some OBGYNs who connect with their patients and set aside time during the appointments to gauge where their patient is emotionally. I think that this is important. I need to feel like I can trust that my doctor has taken my concerns and thoughts seriously. I don't think there's anything more annoying then when a doctor is rushing you out the door...or worse, zoning out while your explaining your symptoms. I don't want to have to deal with that while pregnant. Another concern I have with working with an OBGYN is that they'll try to push medication on me.


      I can see that I'm not going to settle this debate tonight, but at least you can see where my head is at. This is a huge decision. This person will be the first hands to touch my child, the first eyes to see him or her. I need to trust that those hands will be gentle and those eyes will be wise. Some advice would be awesome. For all the mamas out there (or women who are considering getting pregnant): did you use an OBGYN or a midwife? Why did you make that choice?